Dr Shelly Gable is someone who knows what she’s talking about!
In a nutshell:
When someone’s telling you a story and you respond ACTIVELY and CONSTRUCTIVELY,
guess what? LOVE and FRIENDSHIP increase.
There are 4 styles of responding to people’s stories:
- ACTIVE, CONSTRUCTIVE (authentic, enthusiastic support)
- PASSIVE, CONSTRUCTIVE (understated support)
- PASSIVE, DESTRUCTIVE (ignoring the story)
- ACTIVE DESTRUCTIVE (pointing out negative aspects)
Your colleague: ‘ Hey, I’ve just been offered a promotion!’
You:
- That’s great, what’s your new position, when do you start…..
- Nice!
- My wife just started a new job at…….
- Bet you’ll have a much heavier workload…….
Get the idea?
So what style will you be using in the office next week?
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